The Mask

Don't be fooled by me
Don't be fooled by the face I wear,
for I wear a thousand masks,
masks that I'm afraid to take off,
and none of them is me.

Pretending is an art which is second nature to me -
but don't be fooled, for God's sake don't be fooled.

I give the impression that I'm secure, sunny and unruffled,
within as well as without,
that confidence is my name and coolness my game,
that the water's calm and I'm in command, and that I need no-one.

But don't believe me. Please.

That surface may seem smooth,
but my surface is my mask.
Beneath this lies no complacency.
Beneath dwells the real me in confusion,
in fear and aloneness.

But I hide this. I don't want anyone to know it.

I panic at the thought of my weakness and fear of being exposed.
That's why I frantically create a mask to hide behind,
a nonchalant, sophisticated facade to help me to pretend,
to shield me from the glance that knows.

But such a glance is precisely my salvation,
my only salvation, and I know it - that is,
if it is followed by acceptance,
if it is followed by Love;

it is the only thing which will assure me
of what I can't assure myself -
that I'm worth something.

But I don't tell you this. I don't dare, I'm afraid to - afraid your glance will not
be followed by acceptance, will not be followed by Love.

I'm afraid that you will think less of me,
that you will laugh at me,
and your laugh would kill me!
I'm afraid that deep down I'm nothing, that I'm no good,
and that you will see this and reject me.

So I play my game, my desperate game,
with a facade of assurance without,
and a trembling child within.

And so begins the parade of masks. And my life becomes a front.

I chatter idly to you of superficialities.
I tell you everything that is really nothing,
and nothing of what is everything -
of what is crying within me.

So when I'm going through my routine,
do not be fooled by what I'm saying,
what I'd like to be able to say,
what, for survival, need to say but can't.

I dislike hiding - honestly! I dislike the phoney game I'm playing.

I'd really like to be genuine and spontaneous and me.
You've got to hold out your hand
even when that is the last thing that I seem to want.

Only you can wipe away from my eyes the blank stare of breathing death.
only you can call me to aliveness.

Each time you are kind and gentle and encouraging,
each time you try to understand because you really care,
my heart begins to grow wings,
very small wings,
very feeble wings,
but wings!

With your sensitivity and sympathy and your power of understanding
you can breathe life into me.

I want you to know that. I want you to know how important you are to me, how

You alone can break down the wall behind which I tremble.
You alone can remove my mask.
You alone can release me from my shadow-world of panic and uncertainty,
from my lonely person.

Do not pass me by.
Please do not pass me by.
It will not be easy for you.

A long conviction of worthlessness builds strong walls.
The more closely you approach me, the more blindly I strike back.

But I am told that love is stronger than walls,
and in this lies my hope.
Please try to beat down those walls with firm hands
but with gentle hands...for a child is very sensitive.

Who am I, you may wonder?
I am someone you know very well,
for I am every man that you meet,
and I am every woman that you meet.

Chair's welcome for our poetry night

I'd like to talk to you all about a subject close to my heart

No one was looking at mental health so we made a start

We wanted to bring it up as an important topic

Because when people ignore it, that's what gets on our wick

We held a meeting last May to see who would come

And since then we've done loads of work and had lots of fun

Fundraising's our aim to bring services to the town

And driving the stigma around it right down

We believe mental health is on a par with the physical stuff

And those who cope with illnesses are really quite tough

It's hard to find doctors who help and can seem like a task

We want there to be services out there when people ask

Thanks for coming to listen to a few poems tonight

We hope you'll think about donating to make the future bright

If you want to come along and get involved in MHAG

There's a monthly meeting, you won't find it a drag

In between we go to lots of different places

So you might think you've already seen our faces

If you want more information please come and find me

Or Beccy Blake who's my right hand lady

For now I'll end this poem and say goodnight

Because some of my rhymes are really quite shi...

Pledging to do better

I was absolutely delighted when Ian Dipple, the editor of the Redditch Standard (where I work alongside running MHAG), came to me and told me his idea about doing some extensive coverage of mental health to mark World Mental Health Day. As well as telling my own story, we managed to get mayor Pat Witherspoon, council chief exec Kevin Dicks, Dr Tim Lee and various others involved to speak up about the topic. It makes me very proud to work for the paper and to live in the town to see people supporting mental health! As part of the edition, we launched a pledge - we're asking residents and organisations to sign it. One voice is not often heard but if we can get enough voices (and names) then maybe together we can affect the change which is so desperately needed.

To take part, I can e-mail you a copy of the pledge (call me on 07788 379389 or e-mail redditchmhag@gmail.com) or simply save the copy below and send it back to me c/o Redditch Standard, Webb House, Church Green East, Redditch, B98 8RA.

Harriet

Rhyming for a good reason

This week saw us host our second ever Wellbeing Week in Redditch, something we're keen to do every October to mark World Mental Health Day. The first event was a poetry evening at the Redi Centre - we wanted to demonstrate how getting creative can boost your mental health and also show how much talent we have in this town!

 

 

A huge ten people were lined up on the bill to share either their own poems or someone else's - some were on the theme of mental health and some weren't, but the majority were actually written by a Redditch resident. Thanks to our readers: Mark, Rebecca, Ismat, Vanessa, Lyn, Andy, Natalie, Shayan and Pat (the tenth was myself in case you're keeping count!)

 

 

A few extra thanks to Pat Witherspoon, the mayor, for her support of the event, Ray and Margaret for agreeing to host the event in their building, Jan and Andy for their help with organising (Jan and Margaret also made the most delicious cakes which everyone enjoyed), Boon for compering for us, Sally for playing the dulcimer and anyone else who helped in any way.

 

 

It was a hugely enjoyable night, we had at least half a dozen extra readers in the open mic part of the evening and hopefully everyone went away as content and full of cake as I did! We also raised £150 which will go towards mental health projects in the borough.

 

Keep an eye out on Facebook/Twitter in the coming weeks as I'll be posting up some of the poems.

 

Harriet.

What we've done and what's coming up!

Fear not, things with MHAG have been carrying on with our monthly meetings continuing and many great chats about mental health. This blog however I have let slide a little due to not being very well and a brief stay in hospital. I am back on track now and more focused than ever to push MHAG as far as we can and affect change in Redditch. It is desperately needed and wanted!

So some of the things which have been going on:
- We were made the mayor's charity! Pat Witherspoon picked MHAG and Redditch Friends Together as her two charities to help highlight mental health and dementia within the town. Thanks Pat! She's in office until May so plenty of exciting events will be coming up.
- We laughed! Pat hosted a comedy night called Ship Of Fools which was absolutely brilliant. There were five comedians plus compere Ant Hill (thanks to Ant for all his work to make it a success!). Lots of money raised and lots of laughs too.
- We talked! We've spoken to Dr Tim Lee, who's the lead for mental health on Redditch and Bromsgrove Clinical Commissioning Group's governing body, about their plans for the future as well as Helen Broughton from the strategic partnership about the work their mental health committee is doing and Homestart about their services to help people with postnatal depression.
- We visited! We went to events including the Bandstand Festival and Astwood Bank Carnival. It's great to bring mental health to the masses at places like that.

Wellbeing Week:
- Our first event is a poetry evening next Tuesday (October 7) at 7.30pm at the Redi Centre. We're hoping to highlight how getting creative and either reading or creating poetry can help with your mental health. Come along and join us - it's free but donations are welcome!

- Advice shop. As with last year we'll be hosting a two-day advice shop in the Kingfisher Centre. We're outside Primark (by the escalators) all day next Friday and Saturday (October 10 and 11) and we've got plenty of activities, crafts, puzzles, food making etc! Do pop along.

There are also lots of exciting projects in the pipeline and next week with the help of the Redditch Standard (my day job!) we'll be marking World Mental Health Day with the launch of a new pledge for the town.

Harriet.

Update from the chair: February 2014

February has been a fairly busy month for MHAG, starting off on the 1st with some of the group attending the LGBT event at Redditch Library - having a table at events like this is something we are very keen to do as it enables us to speak to people who either may need to access mental health services but need pointing in the right direction or to those who might be interested in getting on board with MHAG and campaigning for better services. All in all, it was a great networking opportunity for us.

The following week we met with representatives from Redditch Borough Council and the Redditch Community Amateur Boxing Club - the former was to find out more about the events they are hosting throughout the summer. We should have a packed schedule with these events plus our own we are hoping to organise. The latter was to hear more about a new project they're hoping to launch and we have a representative coming to our meeting tomorrow to share some more information about that.

On the 7th, we held our Valentine's Ball which was a great event and saw us raising nearly £500 to add to the funds we started gathering last year. We're really hoping to hit our £5,000 target soon and hopefully the combined efforts of these fund-raising events and our Three Peaks challenge will get us much nearer that total!

We've also met with Jestaminute who have some great ideas about Wellbeing Week (to be revealed at our March MHAG) and some of our members have been busy putting together proposals for a mentoring project - the pilot of which should be ready to launch soon.

To round the month off, we have a representative of the Redditch and Bromsgrove Clinical Commissioning Group coming to talk to us tomorrow at our monthly meeting which will be followed by a talk from some people who've completed the Three Peaks challenge who'll be sharing some top tips.

Harriet.

Valentine's Ball

Friday saw us all donning our black, white and red outfits for Redditch MHAG's first Valentine's Ball. The idea of the event was to embrace the wider meaning of the word 'love' - focusing not just on romantic partnerships but also the community and self-esteem which can be key parts of people's mental health and wellbeing.

The event raised nearly £500 which will be used to fund projects in Redditch. We would like to say a massive thank you to all of the staff at Studley Castle, especially Rachel. It was a great venue for the event with a fantastic team who worked hard to ensure it all went smoothly. Also a massive thanks to David, Helen, Sarah, Lee, Elaine, Mary, Mark, Rob, Lisa and Rebecca for pulling together the event and to DJ Miles and photographer Katie.

We had representatives from Samaritans, Early Help, Sandycroft, Mentor Link and Jestaminute there as well as individuals who came to support us. Thank you again to all those who helped to make it a success.

All pictures by Katie Lester - please contact us for her details. 

2014 so far

This year is shaping up to be a busy one for MHAG with the potential launch of a mentoring project to provide ongoing support for residents who have already accessed more short-term help from other services (more on that soon), as well as our Valentine's Ball this Friday at Studley Castle, preparations underway for this October's Wellbeing Week and plenty of other events in between. Last year we touched on the link between wellbeing and physical exercise and some of our members will be truly testing that out when we take on the Three Peaks challenge this August. As well as providing a challenge for those climbing three mountains (Scafell Pike in England, Snowdon in Wales and Ben Nevis in Scotland) in 24 hours, it will hopefully be well supported by the public and help boost our fund-raising for the year. If you'd like to get involved in the challenge it'll be on August 1 and 2 with the option of just climbing Snowdon on the Sunday - there will be a practice of Snowdon on March 9 for those unsure about signing up or wanting to get some mountain-walking hours in early on. Join in by e-mailing redditchmhag@gmail.com or calling Harriet on 07788 379389. Our next meeting will be on Thursday, February 27, at 7pm at Redditch Town Hall when we'll be joined by a representative from the NHS Redditch and Bromsgrove Clinical Commissioning Group to talk about commissioning mental health services in the borough.

2013 review

We spend most of our time looking forward - to the next MHAG event, making plans, sending e-mails about future meetings - but the end of the year provides a welcome opportunity to look back and see the achievements this fairly small group of committed volunteers have already got under their belt just seven months since the formation of the Mental Health Action Group.

If we roll back time to a full year ago, MHAG was simply an idea - a feeling that something more could be done to promote mental health and to help the thousands of people in Redditch alone who need support and may not be able to access it, may not know where to look or may be simply falling through the gaps.

Fast forward to May and we nervously waited at the Town Hall to see whether anyone felt the same as we did. Our first meeting exceeded all expectations, with a good number of both residents and representatives of organisations coming along to share their views - many of whom have remained dedicated MHAG members, getting involved in preparing and volunteering at events, regularly attending meetings to talk about the issues and highlighting key priorities for us going forward.

Very quickly, the need for a support group where people could go regularly to talk to people in a similar situation was highlighted - something taken up by Mary, a public governor for Birmingham and Solihull Mental Health Trust who has taken the group forward and seen it grow into weekly meetings (now held at The Space in Winyates) with good attendance. It is heartening to hear so many of the attendees having had positive experiences, both in the meetings and outside for example by beginning to volunteer.

In October, we held Redditch's first ever Wellbeing Week which saw hundreds of residents take part in various events, from a quiz, two day Advice Shop in the Kingfisher Centre and health and fitness day at the Abbey Stadium to those hosted by organisations including SureStart, Sandycroft, Bromford Support and Your Ideas. To have so many people engaging with us and so many organisations (more than 25) involved in promoting the need for conversations and action surrounding mental health was fantastic and it's something we're very keen to repeat (and improve on) in 2014.

The end of December saw us spend two days over a weekend before Christmas handing out a total of 900 leaflets to shoppers which contained information about mental health, family life, debt and various other support sources which hopefully will have proved helpful to residents struggling over the festive period. It is great to start 2014 having had such a successful 2013 and we already have a number of events in the pipeline which will enable us to have more conversations about mental health, reach more people and to hopefully improve the lives of those suffering with various issues in the borough.

This is a good time to say a heartfelt thank you to every single person involved in MHAG throughout 2013 - those people who have attended our events and engaged with what we have to say, those who have come along to our monthly meetings and those who have taken time out of their busy schedules to talk to us about what their organisation does. A huge thank you goes to our working group who attend extra meetings each month, always come with ideas to help improve MHAG and go above and beyond to keep it going.

I have said before that the main benefit in my eyes of MHAG is the willingness and ability of our members to talk openly about mental health - an issue so often swept under the carpet, stigmatised or simply overlooked. There is a long way to go until mental health is considered on the same level as physical health but by talking about it as openly as we would talk about any other ailment, illness or condition, we can help break down those barriers and make Redditch a place which doesn't discriminate against or turn its back on those who are often the most vulnerable in society. It is idealistic to think we can change the world but if we can make a difference in our town then it is more than worth it.

Thank you,
Harriet.

Sharing information about services and support

Our event over the weekend saw us handing out 900 leaflets to shoppers in Redditch town centre to let them know about a whole host of services and support available to them over the festive period. As ever, it was concerning to hear there are people suffering who don't know what support is out there - and that's something we're hoping to rectify in 2014 as we plan even more events and hopefully reach out to as many residents as possible.

Thank you to all of the people who took the time to stop and speak to us - especially those who told us they came into the town centre just to find out about us. And a massive thank you as ever to all of our volunteers - including a total of seven helpers from Redditch Early Help over the two days, Rob and Sue from Samaritans, support group leader Mary, Neil from Headgym and Brian and Rhiannon Warwick.

 Don't forget, our last meeting of the year starts art 7pm on Thursday (December 19) at the Town Hall. All are welcome.

We'll be sharing the information about services and support on here in the next couple of days so do look out for it or e-mail us on redditchmhag@gmail.com for more information.

Busy times ahead of Christmas

Here at MHAG we're not quite ready to wind down for Christmas yet and instead have a very busy week ahead raising funds and awareness. Our own event runs from 10am to 3pm on Saturday and Sunday (December 14th and 15th) where we'll have information and representatives of borough organisations on hand in the town centre (Church Green area) to let people know about what services and support are available over Christmas. If you'd like any more information and are around in the town centre at the weekend make sure to pop over and have a chat - we'll be wearing our new MHAG t-shirts for the first time so we should be easy to spot!

Our final MHAG meeting of the year will take place on Thursday, December 19th. It'll be much more light-hearted than our normal meetings and we'll be using it as an opportunity to look back over the year's events and enjoy a mince pie or two. Existing and potential members are all invited to join us at the Town Hall at 7pm.

Update from the chair: November 2013.

November may have looked very quiet compared to the buzz surrounding October and Wellbeing Week in particular, but rest assured we have been very busy behind the scenes progressing MHAG and trying to ensure we start 2014 in the best possible position to further the aims of the group.

One of the things we're increasingly keen to do is formalise the group's structure, which would see us have a constitution and eventually applying to become a charitable organisation. We think that will put us in a much stronger position in terms of being able to fund-raise for projects in the town and also as a pressure group. So lots of the work this month has been about researching what the best way forward would be, thinking about how we can raise the money required to take on charity status and putting together a constitution.

However, we want to keep taking action whilst all that work is ongoing - MHAG definitely isn't about sitting round discussing options and never getting anything done - so we've been putting together an event in December which will see us going out into the town centre letting residents know what extra support is available to them if they encounter issues over Christmas. It's one of the key times of the year where people can feel especially vulnerable so hopefully we will be able to point a few people in the direction of a service they might need. Myself and vice-chair Rebecca did a similar thing last December with Samaritans which was well received so hopefully this year with a whole host of organisations on board it will be even more of a positive event. If you'd like to volunteer to help us out for an hour or so on either Saturday 14th or Sunday 15th please do let us know.

There's also lots of planning going on for our 2014 events, we're keeping them under wraps at the moment while the details are decided on but we should be able to start letting you know soon! It's exciting to know we have nearly a whole year of events before we even get to Wellbeing Week 2014 - we've got a range of things going on so there should be something for everyone, fingers crossed!

Key dates for December:
14th and 15th - Town centre leaflet hand out, highlighting services available for residents over Christmas.
19th - Our last MHAG meeting of the year, this will be an informal one so mince pies, a chat and a chance to reflect on 2013 and look forward to 2014!

Harriet.

Reminder: our November meeting

Our November meeting will take place at the same time and place as usual (7pm at Redditch Town Hall) this Thursday (November 28). We welcome members old and new - anyone can come along, whether they're an individual with an interest in mental health or someone who works or volunteers for an organisation which supports residents. We mainly focus on identifying services and potential gaps within those services, tackling stigma and fund-raising ideas.

If you're someone who's struggling with your mental health who would like a relaxed, welcoming environment to spend a couple of hours in each week, the support group runs every Thursday at 11am.

Details for both the action group and the support group are available here. (Click here for more about the support group or here for more about the action group).

Coverage of our December event

Stories about our December event are now up on the websites of both local papers -
 

Redditch Standard

 

Redditch Advertiser

If you'd like to volunteer for an hour or so during the event please let us know, alternatively if you'd like some information about services and support over the Christmas period, we'll be in the Church Green area from 10am to 3pm on Saturday, December 14th, and Sunday, December 15th.

Our first Three Peaks walk

To start our training for the Three Peaks challenge next summer, we had intended to climb Snowdon on Sunday. However, the weather forecast was so bad in terms of fog that we made a decision it would be too dangerous to climb with such poor visibility (you couldn't see the path from the cameras up on the mountain) but so that we could all try out walking boots and stretch our legs a little, instead we went over to Cannock Chase and had a walk there. Obviously it wasn't as strenuous as climbing a mountain but the eight-mile course led us up and down plenty of hills so still had a fairly good walk.

As the winter sets in, it's very unlikely we will be able to do any big climbs until early March but we'll all be trying to do some local walks and keep our general fitness levels up so that we're prepared for next year when the real walking will start! At the moment, we're still planning to aim for the first weekend in August for the challenge itself and we'll also be offering the option of just doing Snowdon for those who want to take part but don't want to do all three mountains.

Contact details if you'd like to take part:
Harriet - 07788 379389
redditchmhag@gmail.com